Monday, April 11

B stands for Belly. a big one.

My sweet little babies are getting big.
Really big.
My-stomach-possibly-could-explode-at-any-minute big.

And I am truly happy for that!
Growing babies are a wonderful thing!

I would, however, like to invent twin belly clothing
because in the 8th and 9th month of pregnancy,
maternity clothes do. not. fit.
and it's not the clothing makers' fault entirely
because they expect bellies that resemble basketballs
and not the former planet Pluto.
but seriously, I need some clothes for these next 6 weeks...

because right now, I'm wearing my husband's college sweatshirt.
because yesterday, I had a conniption when I thought I may have to wear sweatpants to church.
because tomorrow, I'm pretty sure even this sweatshirt won't fit.
And because during the next few weeks
I may have to bust out my Sleevie Wonder
(my endearing name for my slanket)
and wear that exclusively.
And, dear friends, do you truly want to walk next to someone
waddling in her Sleevie Wonder?
I'm thinking you probably don't...

Regardless of the looming clothing disaster,
a fun part of a growing belly
is the infamous belly shot picture
that I dreamed about taking before I got pregnant
and started taking every two weeks when my belly started to grow.

I love taking belly shots
and when I browse through my album,
I picture my girls
growing nice and strong.

I, however, will not be someone who takes belly pictures
of their bare belly.
Bless all of you who can.
While these girls inside my belly may be nice and strong,
this bare belly looks the opposite of nice...
though it is certainly strong...

In fact, my belly could probably sign up to be a wrecking ball alternate.
yes. it's a new career path we have been considering.
yes. you may picture me hanging from a crane ready for action.
I look pretty awesome, don't I?
Sort of like super woman
who ate one too many pieces of chocolate cake
and followed it up with a few pounds of butter wrapped in bacon.

Besides my belly resembling a wrecking ball,
did anyone else wake up one morning while pregnant
and look in the mirror
and wonder first, if they played with electricity recently...
and secondly, if they got a swirly tattoo on their belly...
and finally, realized the stretch marks had come to say hello in a big way...
and never say goodbye?

And while I'm thankful that each of those stretch marks
represents growth of baby girls,
I'm thinking that the little black bathing suit
I wore on my honeymoon
(and only on my honeymoon,
thanks to the "marriage 30" (sort of like that freshman 15) 
I gained the first year)
and was saving just in case I ever fit into it again
should probably be burned
or used as a napkin
or saved to use as a pinafore for my girls' future American girl dolls...
because no one wants to see a
once-upon-a-time bonified twin bearing belly
in a little black bathing suit.
no. one.
not even me.
shaking in the corner at the thought.

but truthfully,
all of this is truly okay with me.

I'll embrace my new career path...
pretend my stretch marks are really a new tattoo honoring the spirograph...
and carry on.

because these two babies
are coming in six.weeks.or.less.
and while this belly may never be the same,
my heart won't be either.

3 comments:

  1. Ooooh my goodness. U put into words EXACTLY how I'm feeling right now. Can't wait to meet our babes! It will be nice to be as to move again lol
    Chrissie

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  2. You are a phenomenal writer, and mommy. I read this aloud to Matt and Ron. We were dying, followed by "awws". :)

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  3. I laughed out loud.
    So, so fun.

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